The Long Distance Relationship That Works

Get out your rulers! In today’s lesson, we are going to measure the distance.  I’m referring to long-distance of course.

And as per tradition, my lesson will be unorthodox.  Based on personal and vicarious experience, I refuse to mourn the trials and tribulations of long-distance relationships.

A large part of my client base is composed of international business people who travel minimally two weeks per month and need the equivalent of a dog tag to remember where home is. Their travel schedules have wreaked havoc on their body’s circadian rhythms, passports and ability to find “the one.” But when given the opportunity, they have shown me that long-distance relationships can help them keep “the one.”

There is a quality that is unique to long-distance relationships that can transform the most mundane aspects of life, into the warmest moments of a romantic comedy.

John, a handsome fifty-something year old doctor from California, swept away Dayna, a Toronto-based lawyer, by simply flying 7 hours to meet her on their first-date.  (Cue collective “Awww!”)

Two years later, their relationship is still as good as new.

Indeed, long-distance relationships have a unique capacity to feel fresh, new and romantic regardless of their age. The lack of routine prevents them from being taken for granted. And the constant yearning and anticipation between couples propels greater effort on both ends.

The three cardinal rules of long-distance relationships that keep the flame burning can also benefit other types of relationship, so please note and memorize them. They are as follows:

-Never show up to the airport looking a penny less than a million bucks.

-Seize every opportunity to have sex and do it like the world is ending… even if the headache is real!

-Avoid unnecessary conflict at all costs by inserting “We just have a few hours left together” every time hints of a disagreement arise or annoying qualities nip at your nerves.

Of course, I could not impart these lessons without a warning: Long distance relationships are MAC compatible and only for those who have already mastered the art of sexting. Refresher course next lesson.

Class dismissed!